Lady and the Is A Tramp

My dog is a whore.

So, this afternoon, I thought some unsuspecting fool meanie had abducted my idiot precious dog. She was home when I left, and M.I.A. when I got home 2 1/2 hours later. WTF?? Seeing as how my neighbor's dogs (2 of Chablis' pups) were almost abducted the other day, and Chablis NEVER runs away, I got a little excited worried. I asked Mr & Mrs. Kravitz if they had seen her, and they hadn't. So, I got in the car and drove around with the windows down, hollering for her. I asked the water meter guy if he had seen a very pregnant black dog waddling around the neighborhood. "no, but i saw a beagle a minute ago." Yeah, cause that helped me...

So, I drove home to get the phone book and call animal control. Damn new phone book is all kinds of jacked up so it took me like 15 minutes to find the number. Grrr

Anyway, called animal control, no black preggo dog picked up or brought in. They also said if they pick one up with tags (she has 2) that they immediately call the owner. Shit...

Soooo anyway, I decided to go out and yell for her one more time, then proceed to get pissed. Then I thought, "what if that lazy bitch is chillin in the dog house next door?" So, I went into the neighbor's backyard, looked into the dog house, stepped in shit, and no Chablis. Then, something caught my attention. In my backyard, amongst the weeds, I caught a glimpse of a speck of something black.

I went in my back yard, looked under the shed, and there in a whole she dug to get underneath the shed, was my retarded dog

and her 5 puppies.

great...i'm a grandmother again...

anyone want a free pup in 6 weeks?!

pictures to come soon...