Schedule of a Bridesmaid: Part III

The Day After The Wedding:

• Wake up entirely too early (and still semi-drunk) to Friend saying "There's a naked woman in my bed!"
• Open one eye to look at him, informing him it is entirely too early to be awake
• Get groped by Friend (after all, you are half naked in his bed)
• Tell Friend to go away, you need sleep
• Curse yourself for parking behind Friend
• Pee & get dressed without looking in mirror
• Gather giant flower arrangement and everything else you brought with you, get in car
• Vow to not move until sunglasses are found
• Drive to Cambodian Donut Shop, followed by Friend
• Get informed by Friend that you indeed look like a bloodshot raccoon
• Get funny looks from donut ladies
• Get even funnier look from Friend's co-worker who showed up at donut shop
• Get hesitant bye kiss from Friend, drive home
• Get home, drop everything by the door, check on dogs you apparently forgot about the night before.
• Take lots and lots of drugs, go to bed for the rest of the day
• Vow to kill anyone that calls while you are nursing hangover
• Plan said murder after first 3 phone calls
• Turn phone off, pass out, while still wearing sunglasses because your bedroom is entirely too bright