peace out...

alrighty, my bags are packed, there are fresh sheets on the bed and lots of coffee and cereal...my guest bloggers should be comfy...oh except it's finally time to light my damn furnace but i need to get it cleaned before i do that...so, i'll put some extra blankies out for y'all

went to the doc today. i thought they were going to do injections today. WRONG! it was just a $90 follow up to my $2000 MRI that was a follow up to my $150 office visit. WTF?! Ugh...anyway, turns out I have not one, but TWO count them, TWO, herniated discs! YAY ME!

*this is not my actual MRI, this is merely an example of one of the two herniated discs. the ghetto top arrow shows the location of my second one*

Soooo we talked about this and that and he wrote me a lovely prescription for 50 more ultra mega strength hydrocodone (which i rarely actually take). So, I thought, well it only takes 20 minutes for an injection so i said "ok can we do it now?" haha WRONG! apparently, it does only take about 20 minutes, but it involves me basically preparing myself for surgery (not eating or drinking after a certain time, taking dark nail polish off my nails - if they touch my pedicure i may hurt them) and then, i go in, they put a flippin IV in me then sedate me, then put me face down on a table under a live x-ray machine, and hook me up to heart and oxygen monitors. they then look around with the live x-ray machine, to find just the right spot to stick the needle. did i mention this procedure is called an epidural something or other? yeah, i'm getting an epidural and don't even get to take a baby home afterwards. anyway, after they locate the right spot, a needle is inserted in my spine and ink is injected. why ink? so they can see if they are squirting it in the right spot because the live x-ray might not be as exact as they need it to be. such words of comfort. after the ink is injected, they watch the not always accurate live x-ray and make sure they didn't inject a blood vessell with ink, nick a nerve, or just flat didn't squirt it in the right spot. grrrreat. anyway, after that fun little torture experiment trial run and the needle is in the correct spot, they will inject a cortizone/anesthetic combo in my spine. after the procedure, i will be wheeled into recovery. once my breathing is back to normal and i awaken from the anesthesia, i will be released to the care of a family member over the age of 18. they will not do the procedure should i decide to use public transportation wtf? i'm then to go home and rest. for 24 long fucking hours...no driving...nada...i should start to feel some relief in 4-7 days. So, since they can't fucking get me in until the 29th, by DECEMBER 6th, i might be feeling a little bit better...

someone just fucking shoot me

now, if you will excuse me, i'm going to go eat some supper so i can take a damn pain pill...

oh, and y'all have got to read this...i nearly pissed myself! it's hilarious...